I would start by appreciating the kind of friendship that I have with you all. I am writing this letter reminding you that my family and I have got your back always and would also like to remind you of the fundamental role that we play in your lives.
Just come to think of it, most of you think about us soon as you wake up since we help you with a lot of chores. You are able to buy your groceries relaxed at home within a click of the mouse. To all the New Media students, your lecturer gave you an assignment yesterday, and all you can think of is searching answers from Internet. I am wondering whether you even bother to think for yourself before you consult her. Believe you me, I am not saying relying on me is bad but it comes with consequences because not all the information that you get from me is true. This is the entire human race’s fault because some of you are making money out of me by publishing wrong information to sell their products.
When you miss your friends in London we are the mediators. You also know that Beyoncé is pregnant and that there is someone called Donald Trump because of me. Not forgetting to mention that we know some your secrets and what is happening in your lives because we are your eyes and ears. Just a few minutes back, Cindy used me to book a ticket to Korea. I wonder if you humans can do without me but from my own observation most of you are technologically sired. We are just glad to know that our existence is appreciated.
Let me also remind you that, as much as I can offer you security within a click of a button, do not be too comfortable because as much as we can give we also have the ability to destroy you. I also come with consequences. Do not even think this is a joke; diseases such as ‘excessive individualism’ exist because of us. I also know most of you have heard rumors of my grandsons WhatsApp and Facebook who have been causing havoc in some people’s marriages and they are all true. Because of his barbaric nature that pops up at any-time, some have lost their lives.
The whole point of me writing this letter is to inform all of you about the merits and de-merits of using us. Let it stick in your minds.
Your loving friend
by Linketsang Moyo