By Leeandah

Where ever we are our shadow never leaves us.Some say ‘my shadow is the only thing that walks beside me’. Even in the dark it is there but we cannot see our shadows and they reflect who we are. When talking about shadows in relationships one is talking about the boyfriends and girlfriends that we have but they are not official or made public.They are there with us but when we are facing the sun no one can see them. But then, all the beauty of life is made up of light and shadow.

We all have that one person we talk to when we are low, feeling lonely, and heart broken. That one person in most instances once asked you out in your life and the relationship is more or less just friendship. The ‘shadow’ is always with you everywhere, they are well updated on what is happening in your relationship and there are there to stand by you when you fall.

The shadow provides a shoulder to lean on in times of sorrow.Shadow partners become more active especially when one is facing problems in their relationship or their relationship has broken up. In some cases the shadow acts as your adviser in your relationship with your partner. The shadow can offer advises that can make your relationship strong with your partner.

When asking people if they have a shadow boyfriend, 90% of the people asked said they have a shadow partner. Prudence Mpofu said shadow partners are essential in a relationship because you can always have someone in your life that you can talk to like you are talking to your boyfriend when you are down and low.

Malone Gwadu defines  a ‘shadow’ as a just a ceremonial thing just like the shadow ministers that opposition parties have in their parties. He says it is just something that imitates the real tangible object but it is not the real thing.

Moreover, a ‘shadow’ can be that ex-boy/girlfriend that you still have an attachment to. The relationship might be done but you still have a soft spot for each other though you both moved on.

Some people defined a shadow as a ‘sex mate’, someone who is there to offer you that solace when you need it. The ‘no strings attached’kind of relationship. When one needs to free their minds they seek for their ‘shadow’. The shadow kind of relationship is sometimes problematic when one tends to control the ‘shadow’ in the relationship. This happens especially when the partner does not want you to have a relationship besides the ‘shadow’ thing you are engaged in.

If one is a shadow, the question that remains is for how long will one be a shadow and does that person know that they are your shadow? What damage will be there if your partner finds out the ‘shadow’?


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