How Should Christians Date

thCACPKEJJ

By Bridget Sengu

There are only two outcomes of relationships: that is to get married or breaking up. The secret is knowing how to handle a dating relationship so you know if the other person is worth marrying or he/ she is honored in the breakup.

Unfortunately, it seems like many young singles struggle to figure out just how to handle dating – and I’m not the only one who’s noticed how weird the Christian dating scene can be. As my friend Natasha, married and in her thirties, recently remarked, “I am sure glad I was not much of a Christian when I started dating my husband!”

I constantly hear old women small groups, murmuring, “My daughter was interested in this nice Christian boy, but he strung her along for a year and a half. The next one did too.” Or, “Buhle acted like they were friends but she told me later that they were hooking up on the side.” With that kind of dismal dating culture at play, let’s consider the options:

First, there’s Duggar Dating (Duggar dating is the modern-day form of arranged marriages). I donot have first-hand knowledge, but thanks to reality TV, I believe it appears to involve asking the woman’s dad if she is available to date, and possibly not kissing until the actual wedding.

Outside the Duggar-verse, there is the less overt but just as prevalent “ideal spouse” dating. This involves judging a potential guy or girl for the 38 qualities you are looking for in an ideal mate—before even grabbing coffee together. It’s like arranged marriages where no one is making the arrangements, and it doesnot seem to work very well.

At the opposite extreme, there is “Faux Christian Dating”—in which young Christians have no idea what to do with dating, so they avoid it. Instead of dating, lots of “hanging out” occurs. “Hanging out”, leads to all kinds of mixed feelings. Does he like me? Is she flirting? What does this text mean? Why did he sit next to me at church? Did she want my sweatshirt because she was cold, or because she likes me?

Sometimes the “hanging out” leads to hooking up, which is another uber-confusing side effect of the Faux Christian Dating cycle.

But what if there was another option? What if Christians just began to date like normal people—not dating toward immediate marriage and not eschewing dating for the less-desirable “hanging out” no man’s land? Here’s what I think it would require:

1) Date indiscriminately

Stop evaluating whether the guy who’s taken an interest in you is strong and tenderhearted enough to raise your future kids.

Stop evaluating whether the new girl at church is hot enough and “low-maintenance” enough for your liking.

If you take notice, if you are intrigued or interested, make a date! Get together—one on one. It is worth spending at least a little bit of time with the person before you decide if they are worth marrying.

2) Date casually

Not every date needs to be a total success. But it’s foolish to think that the way a girl or guy acts in a group of friends is the same as how they’ll act one on one.

3) Date often

Sometimes we all need a little practice with figuring out what we really want–not in terms of our “ideal spouse” but a real flesh-and-blood human.

4) Date toward interest, not toward marriage

“Do you think Christian girls make dating too serious?” I asked several guys recently. “I need a buffer of at least five dates before I’m thinking of any future at all!” said one young man.

Advertisements

What Is Spirituality?

By Pelagia Bhebhe

Nuage de mots - Spiritualité Many scholars view spirituality as distinctly tied to religiousness and define spirituality as the relationship an individual has with a higher power or powers. In general, others define this term as a search for meaning in the pursuit of highest human potential.

In this case, spirituality entails striving to attain or achieve a goal. Still other scholars consider spirituality a general life force that serves to guide one’s decision making and ways of living. Although definitions vary, their commonality is that spirituality, unlike religiousness, tends to be considered unique, individualized, and adaptable. It is likely that no two individuals’ spirituality would be exactly alike, that it may vary within and across cultures, that the degree it influences one’s life would greatly vary, and that many more people would claim to be spiritual than religious. Recent large-scale studies have found that 40% of people report following religious teachings in everyday life, while 80% report an interest in spirituality and 83% believe in the sacredness of life. Research has shown that regardless of the precise definition, spirituality can have a large impact on one’s life, including one’s career.

The study of spirituality in general has recently burgeoned, and in turn additional investigations have begun to explore how spirituality relates to careers and work. A series of theoretical models have been proposed that link spirituality and career development, and each model emphasizes that individuals’ spirituality should be considered in their decision-making process as it may be a critical component of their self-concept. A minimal amount of empirical research has also been completed, addressing the connections between spirituality and specific career-related variables. For example, researchers have found that college students who had greater spiritual awareness or a strong spiritual presence in their lives reported higher career decision self-efficacy and career choice commitment. For working adults, indices of spiritual well-being have been tied to greater job satisfaction. Other qualitative studies with college students and adults have found that spiritual individuals report a greater desire to serve others, that they feel more supported during career-related struggles, and that they are more likely to view their career as a calling. What this theoretical and empirical work suggests is that spirituality may be inexplicably linked to interest and value development, decision making, and coping in all stages of the career process. This notion may be especially important for career counselors who work with clients in helping them both make career decisions and cope with the world of work.

The Rastafarian Culture

This culture is actuallya movement, rather than a music genre. The movement emerged in Jamaica among working-class and peasant black people in the early 1930s, arising from an interpretation of Biblical prophecy based on Ras Tafari Makonnen having been the only African king in the world, and his titles of King of Kings, Lord of Lords and Conquering Lion of Judah. Other factors leading to its rise included black social and political aspirations, and the teachings of their prophet, Jamaican black publicist and organiser Marcus Garvey, whose political and cultural vision helped inspire a new world view. The movement is sometimes called Rastafarianism however, this may be considered an improper reference.

The Rastafari movement has spread throughout much of the world, largely through immigration and interest generated by Nyahbinghi and reggae music—most notably, that of Bob Marley, who was baptised Berhane Selassie (Light of the Trinity) by the Ethiopian Orthodox Church before his death, a step also taken later by his widow Rita. By 2000, there were more than one million Rastafari worldwide. About five to ten percent of Jamaicans identify themselves as Rastafari. Most Rastafarians are vegetarian, or only eat limited types of meat, living by the dietary Laws of Leviticus and Deuteronomy in the Old Testament.

ZIMBO Musicians Ready to cash In?

PhotoGrid_1493139898752
Top pic : Bundu Boys ; Bottom Left : Oliver Mtukudzi ; Bottom Center : Lovemore Majayivana; Bottom left : Stella Chiweshe

by Melusi Manabe

The Zimbabwean Music World has never been shy of talent, from the legendary Bundu Boys, Lovemore Majaivana, Thomas Mpfumo, Stella Chiweshe and still going strong Oliver Mtukudzi all being world class acts. However, none of these celebrated superstars ever got any significant wealth through music.

We could blame the lack of financial backing from music labels at that time, or the fact that music was not really viewed as a career at that time.
Fast forward 2017 a new generation of stars have emerged; ready to monetize their brands, breaking barriers and proving to have a business edge over the past generation. Notable mentions are Jah Prayzah , Ammara Brown, Oskid and Andy Cutter are breaking barriers opening doors to the regional and continental market and getting paid.

Jah Prayzah
JP, as he is effectively known these days, is arguable Zimbabwe’s now guy breaking all musical records and setting new ones in with his music entrepreneurship skills. Though controversial in many ways JP has found the recipe for success in his music. He is currently a goodwill ambassador for the Zimbabwe Defense Forces. He set the regional motion last year when he collaborated with Diamoind Platnumz in smash hit,Watoramari,that is still grinding with online views currently standing at 5 million views. JR did not stop there he again set the mark for his counterparts making another smash hit with Mafikizolo this year. Their song Sendekera is currently pulling 613 000+ views on YouTube. He has also opened the doors for his other Zimbabwean counterparts on TraceAfrica music channel.

 

maxresdefault
The musical hustler also has established his own music label, Military Touch Movement, surrounding his camp with fan favorite power houses ExQ, Andy Muridzo, Nutty O, Tahle and producer DJ Tamuka.

Ammara Brown
The sensational Ammara has truly outgrown her father’s shadow. Being the daughter of the late iconic Andy Brown has not limited her brand but she has shown that she is her own person. From amassing collaborations with Jah Prayzah, Tytan she landed a regional collaboration with Dj Zinhle and Sizwe Ngubani in a multi linguistic hit Owami.

Though she is yet to release an album her single heats and quality videos have gained her an immense following. Her music videos have also made it to Trace Africa opening her up to the regional market. She has also indulged into acting expanding her income generating base in ZBC’s Muzita RaBaba television drama series.

15420843_10154115847136361_2529229302937635744_n

Andy Cutter
Arguable Zimbabwe’s hottest music video producer, Andy Cutta is setting strides in the musical scene. He has produced music videos which have gotten award recognition like
Takura’s MaObama and Zini IRema. His latest work with Sandra Ndebele redefined her putting her back in the spotlight. With his creative musical talent it’s clear that a lot is yet to come from this video masterpiece maker.

Oskid
Oskid is the countries number one music producer with several hits on his belt. He is talented in all genres and has produced smashing hits for top musicians in the country including, Jah Prayzah [Mudhara Vachauya], Ammara Brown and ExQ [Bachura], and Winky D [25].
He recently launched a clothes label, OSKID, with a range of clothing accessories which include t-shirts, caps, and hoodies.

OSKIDConsidering his young age and the number of awards he has won, it’s safe to say that a lot is yet to come from this young producer.

So Google got scammed! What about me?

by ANDILE KHUMALO

I read an article Facebook and Google admitted to be being scammed online up to $100 million. The two are arguably the biggest technology companies on earth and they fell victim to scam by a Lithuanian man. They just announced they recouped their funds obviously because they are powerhouses of the internet but what if I get scammed, I sure am not the biggest technology company how on earth will I ever get my money back??. This should definitely make you start to think about your security online.

In this new era where we are adopting Econet master cards and of course the cash crisis where the laggards (sorry if you one them) have started living a cashless life news of Google are very frightening.  I don’t want to be the next victim.

So the Google and Facebook scamming happened and they have their money back now, but this just proved that internet safety is still at owner’s risk. I’m not advocating for back treading, quite the contrary I am a firm believer in cashless transactions. There is a lot to be gained when money is not kept under the mattress that same money can be loaned to someone like you and me to grow my business or for you to invest in yourself while the owner is not currently using and they can gain it back whenever they want it. The scam is teaching us that just like thieves breaking into your local grocery store it can happen to anyone and we should stay guarded. Preventing some scams is your own job. Don’t put easy to crack password, thoroughly assess who you deal with and of don’t give out your information because it’s a crazy out here someone somewhere is always trying to end you.

Let’s share stories of stories of internet scams that we’ve heard of to help each other below, till the next one stay secure.

50 shadeS of BEAUTY

BY LINKETSANG MOYO

Beauty is no quality in things themselves. It exists merely in the mind which contemplates them; and each mind perceives a different beauty. One person may even perceive deformity, where another is sensible of beauty; and every individual ought to acquiesce in his own sentiment, without pretending to regulate those of others. (Hume 1757, 136)

You and I know it well that new media technologies have spoon-fed girls with the idea that they can only be beautiful if they have long legs, great hair, and curves in all the right places. Why do we let other people define for us what beauty is instead of defining it ourselves? We have become individuals is vagrant docility who think new media technologies offer solutions to all our problems.

50 shades of beauty

We have to face it with the naked eye; it is not outrageous to say that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Beauty is subjective. However, due to the influence of new media technologies that have brought with them this disease called identity crisis, in many people’s minds, there exist distorted versions of what defines beauty.

There has been democratisation of beauty lately if you have to search the Internet. What we define as beauty is what social media sites like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram among others have defined for us. Most people have come to believe that beauty is defined by skin colour and some have even gone to the extent of buying dangerous face chemicals without considering the after effects which might even result in loss of life all in the name of becoming a “yellow bone.’ Some of the face chemicals advertised online are not even effective but sold by ‘consumeristic’ individuals who exploit other individuals to make money.

Well Internet media sites like You-tube, Facebook you name it tend to define beauty by focusing their attention on models and unattainable standards of perfection. You will realise that that more than ever before most women tend to define beauty from women they see while scrolling through social media.

While we busy chasing after this beauty that has been defined for us in social media sites, we should keep in mind that the portrayal of women on social media is ‘unrealistic.’ Just stand in front of the mirror and take a look at yourself from head to toe and from toe to head. That is the real definition of beauty.